Most people find it easy to fall in love in high school all the way up to university. Yet, once you enter the working world, it seems that just being attracted to someone who is eligible is a hardship in itself!
If you’re a working adult who finds it hard to find love, there could be six plausible reasons why. Check out the below and find which one applies to you.
The word “busy” is the buzzword of most working adults. Yes, we are all busy making our way up the career ladder, or with our own business. Then, there’s having to spend time with family and friends, both of which are important.
However, there’s no reason to be so busy that we completely have no time for love. Much as we’ve worked hard for our education or to get the perfect job, love is also something you have to give time to.
Whether it’s something simple like going out for a date with a new person per month, or joining singles events, just dedicating some hours of your life per week to the pursuit of love will do wonders.
2. Not Prioritizing Love
Just like how being “busy” is a form of not prioritizing love in your life, there are other ways in which you may be neglecting love. For one, there’s also your mindset towards love.
Perhaps you believe that love only comes along when it’s fated to be. However, this is a common misconception.
As the saying goes, “your vibe attracts your tribe”. If you put off love because you believe it will come to you naturally, that will be a mistake. Showing that you are sincere about pursuing love (by making an effort to find love) is the better way to bring The Right One to you.
3. Having Unrealistic Requirements about Love
Wait a minute, you may be saying. You are already dedicating hours to finding love by going out on dates and meeting other singles. You’re also sure that you’re actively seeking love, instead of just waiting for it to come around.
However, you’re still not finding love… and this could be because you have unrealistic expectations and requirements about love.
It’s normal for all people to have requirements about the person they want to spend the rest of their life with. However, it’s also possible to have TOO many requirements!
It’s better to list down three absolute must-haves you want your partner to have, and to compromise on the rest. After all, when it comes down to it, traits like kindness and loyalty are more important than temporary features like a pretty face or a fancy job title, right?
4. Not Seeking Self-Improvement
Another common reason why people don’t find love is that they believe “the person I’m dating should accept me as I am”. While that is true, it is not a reason for anyone to slack off and not live up to their true potential!
There is always room for improvement in everything, whether it’s in being kinder, refining your self-presentation and social behaviour, or even adding new skills like cooking to improve yourself.
To meet the right one, you should also strive to be the right one yourself. Besides, improving yourself is not just good for your love life, it’s also good for your life in general.
5. Stuck in the Past
This reason for not finding love applies to those who find it hard to forget a former love. Perhaps you may think that you are over someone… except that you compare the person you’re seeing with that particular someone.
Forgetting about someone you once loved is hard. However, if someone is in your past, you shouldn’t let them control your future. Go out, meet someone, and try to get to know them without letting your past love influence you.
If not, you could very well be chasing away love that’s right for you, because you keep focusing on the wrong one.
6. Worrying Too Much About Commitment
This may sound like a great reason to actually attract love. After all, if you’re serious about commitment, this should be an attractive quality.
However! While it’s great to treat love seriously, there is also a danger in putting too much expectations on the people you meet for dates. If you go to a date expecting that the person you meet will be your future spouse, you may be too nervous to present yourself in a charming way.
In fact, you may also not want to meet up with the other person again because your first impression of them led you to believe that they’re not going to be girlfriend or boyfriend material.
Don’t let your search for what you think is “REAL” commitment blind you to the fact that most relationships don’t start off with such heavy expectations. A lot of couples say that they never would have expected to end up in a relationship with their long-term partner.
Yet, they stuck together through thick and thin, and then they just naturally fell in love.
For most people, that’s how they find love. They meet other people via various avenues (through friends or through dating apps), they realize they get along well, and then slowly, they fall in love without realizing it.
Even if you’re a working adult, love can definitely happen to you too. Happy dating!