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Boys, if you’ve watched even one romcom, you’ll know how appealing the girls on the big screen ostensibly are. They all have charming quirks and beautiful smiles that make you weak at the knees. You may fantasize about dating girls like that, but in reality, you may adore them a lot less.
1. The Manic Pixie Dream Girl, or MPDG
You know the character. She’s cute, eccentric, and more often than not, has bangs. She’s spunky, comes up with the wackiest ideas, and is frequently played by adorkable Zooey Deschanel.
She seems super fun to date, especially if you fancy yourself a brooding young man who needs a spark (or a sparkly fairy of a girl) in your life. But here’s what dating her would really be like:
You meet the girl. She brings you on the wildest adventures. She adorns the both of you with wildflowers. You’ve never been this excited in your life. You think to yourself that this is The One. But you slowly start to tire of her refusal to grow up. “Are you out of your mind?” becomes your mantra in the relationship, as her antics become less exhilarating and more exhausting to you.
You tell her to shut up and stop singing so you can get some sleep. You shake your head at how she has absolutely no sense of responsibility and an inflated sense of entitlement. The two of you eventually break up and you over-compensate and date a corporate high-flyer next. Corporate high-flyer then breaks up with you because your crazy MPDG ex-girlfriend scratched said corporate high-flyer’s Mercedes or did something equally juvenile.
2) The Accident Prone
She’s a damsel in distress and always needs your help. Famous examples include Kristen Stewart’s Bella Swan from Twilight. Her dependence makes you feel important and feeds your masculine pride. Except when you start growing resentful towards her:
“Baby, I fell and hurt myself for the third time this week,” she wails over the phone. You half-heartedly offer to come pick her up and buy her a Band-Aid, even though you’ve bought her at least five packets of them in your three months of dating her and she always forgets them at home.
You mutter something about her being an idiot under your breath and hang up, resigning yourself to saving yet another one of her days. You’re so tired of being with someone who constantly has new needs that you have to worry about, and break up with her when she calls you about a paper cut an hour later.
3) The “I Am Not Pretty”
Tris tells Tobias she’s not pretty in Divergent – when really, she’s smokin’. These beautiful girls actually believe themselves to be homely, making them endearing to you. She’s hot AND humble. Score! But really, dating girls who refuse to admit that they are at least conventionally attractive isn’t as fun as One Direction’s What Makes You Beautiful might have led you to believe – most of the time, they’re really just fishing for compliments:
“I’m having a bad hair day, baby,” she tells you. “You’re still beautiful,” you smile adoringly at her. “No, I’m not,” she protests. “Of course you are!” “I’m not! I’m getting fat.” You honestly say to her, “well, you’ve gained some weight, but it looks good on you!” Next thing you know, you’re getting the cold shoulder and she sulks incessantly in front of you for the rest of the day, even though she called herself fat first and you have no idea why it’s such a big deal.
4) The Ingenue
She’s shy, innocent and virginal – think Cher Horowitz from Clueless. Her mind has never been tainted by the grime and filth of the external world, and you marvel at her incorruptibility. But you may not be cut out for a long-term relationship with her:
You constantly need to explain crude jokes to her. She’s easily offended by provocative remarks. You feel great pressure to take things super slow in order to respect her decisions, even though a more primal part of you doesn’t want to. She’s really preachy and keeps up a holier-than-thou act, and you find yourself getting drunk with the boys more often in rebellion. Also, she’s kind of dumb. You can’t break up with her either, because you’re afraid you’ll destroy her emotionally. Basically, you’re screwed.
5) The One-of-the-Boys
She’s basically you – except she has girl parts (and is often really hot). Cameron Diaz’s Mary in There’s Something About Mary is a good example – she’s all about sports games and chugging beer. She’s good to chill with and is a total bro. But if you have even a single ounce of chauvinism in you, stay away:
She belches like a man and makes flatulence jokes. It’s a little off-putting, because you kind of want her to be more feminine to complement your own masculinity. She seemed incredibly cool at first, but now you’re a little grossed out. You flinch when she swears like a sailor and feel sorry for yourself when she drinks you under the table and calls you a lightweight.
Chances are, though, you’ll never have to experience any of these scenarios, because that’s the thing about tropes: they aren’t realistic representations of women. So stop fantasizing about dating these women – they don’t exist, and you’re going to have a plenty hard time trying to find someone like that or compelling your partner to adapt to fit your ideal trope. Embrace your current/future Significant Other for the multi-faceted and complicated person she is! She’s better and more beautiful than any of these stock characters: she’s real.
LunchClick is Singapore’s first female-centric dating app, developed by the dating experts behind the Lunch Actually Group, the biggest dating agency in South East Asia with over 10 years of proven track record. LunchClick is perfect for serious daters and singles looking to find love – we’re SDN (Social Development Network) accredited, and we manually approve all profiles to ensure that you only meet genuine & quality singles. No swiping, no chatting, just offline dates! What are you waiting for? Download the app on the Play Store or App Store today!